It's been said that ' We don't really listen in western culture we just wait & re-load' ... This is no doubt an experience that many of us have had, both in ourselves and in others, and one that is often difficult to avoid in a context where sensory stimulation and the yang energy of productivity and individualism is celebrated and revered. Yet Listening, while clearly at the foundation of effective psychotherapy and healing could also be seen to be a fundamental aspect of all human connectivity & relationships. The fact that psychotherapy works at all could be said to rest on this very fact; being listened to, truley listened to and heard allows healing to begin to take place as Carl rogers states:

‘When I have been listened to and when I have been heard, I am able to re-perceive my world in a new way and to go on. It is astonishing how elements that seem insoluble become soluble when someone listens, how confusions that seem irremediable turn into relatively clear flowing streams when one is heard. I have deeply appreciated the times that I have experienced this sensitive, empathic, concentrated listening.’

Carl R. Rogers

Somehow listening, through not only our ears but all of our senses, allows us to open up in a profound way to the other, to connect with that which is outside of ourselves, allow others to do the same and to also connect to that which is deeply within us.....

Other cultures across the globe have much to teach us in this regard, however if we stay closer to home there is also much to learn.. Judy Atkinson(2002) in her book 'Trauma Trails : Recreating Song lines' writes of the aboriginal concept of 'Dadirri' which refers to a deep contemplative process of listening to one another in reciprocal relationships. The word Dadirri is of the Ngangikurungkurr people of the Daly area of the northern territory however the activity of Dadirri has an equivilant in many other indigenous groups across Australia. Dadirri itself is understood to be a non-intrusive observation, or quietly aware watching; a deep listening and reflective non-judgemental observation of what has been heard.

'Dadirri is at its deepest level a search for understanding and meaning. It is listening and learning at its most profound level - more than listening just with the ear but listening from the heart.'

Atkinson goes on to state that a primary function of Dadirri is knowledge and consideration of community and the diversity and unique nature that each individual brings to community....through the stillness and contemplation of dadirri shared knowledge becomes a growing awareness in the community or a circle of meaning and that the idea that...

'all people have a story, all people matter and all people belong'

It could be said that the concept of Dadirri has much to offer western culture and also much to teach those who are paid to listen...especially in terms of the idea that something profound and healing can occur through stillness, silence and openness. That we can through listening, learn about ourselves, assist others to do the same, and develop community and connections that break down the barriers of isolation and seperation which cause so much pain in this world...

So how do we listen with the heart, how do we learn to listen to ourselves and others in a way that provides doorways to the profound interconnectivity that we are all part of?

This we will explore in the next post.....